My Chickens

This is Dave. My sister Sara has a sign in her bathroom that says "Parenthood is like slowly being pecked to death by chickens." That statement is now a little more real than it was 5 days ago when Lenore left with Lily to Virginia. It has been just Me, E and Rose the Nose. Here is what I've learned:

1.) Silence should not be cherished. It should be feared. Someone is playing with a permanent marker and the clock is ticking.
2.) Food in a child's stomach multiplies in volume and stink. I don't care what they've eaten - when they toss their cookies, prepare yourself for Thanksgiving.
3.) Breakfast, dollar-store, tasty lunch, banana-bread snack, swimming for 3 hours followed by 2 hours of cartoons doth not a grateful child make. You want gratitude? Try a 3 hour bedroom timeout.
4.) Cheerios + Milk + 2 hours creates a chemical bond stronger than super-glue, nay, stronger even than Wesley and Buttercup's love from Princess Bride.
5.) "Man was not meant to be alone..." Uh, yes. This statement is 100% true.

I love my kids!