Motherhood

As a mother, I feel so discouraged sometimes! The kids will find any little thing to get mad at eachother about and fight. They are all so passionate about life and their own little world that they are so easily angered. Something that I look on as a trivial thing is so important to them. I feel like all I ever do all day is make life good for my children. I feed them every meal, I help them get dressed, I take them to parks, to the pool, help them play the Wii or nickjr.com. I wish I had a giant feeding me, dressing me, and carrying me around to fun activities all day! :) I am always running around tickling them, reading books, and helping them with their chores. I try to teach them little gospel lessons every day and we do our family scripture readings mostly consistently! Where am I going wrong? Why is it that I do my best and give them these great things and they fight and are ungrateful?! Sure, I don't do everything for them and they each have a chore chart and things that they are responsible for too, but pleeease!

It struck me a few days ago when Lils threw a fit that we didn't go to this other pool, we just spent 2 1/2 hours at our normal pool that things were getting out of hand. That next day I made Lils and E spend the entire morning in their rooms. The first hour they would open their doors and say, "I'm bored!!!" and I would then say, "That's your own fault, if you want to do something fun, then do it! You have all of the things in your room. Play." So they did well after that in their rooms and were surprisingly friendly and kind to eachother that afternoon.

I was complaining to Dave a few days ago that I felt SO under-appreciated! All I want is for my kids to be happy! All I want is for them to get along, learn, grow, become well-rounded people. That's all I do all day! I read to them, teach them, play... ok, Ive already gone there... sorry! :) You know what I'm saying! Dave listened to all of my whining and then with a few words, he taught me one of the most important lessons of my life. He said, "That's probably how Heavenly Father feels about us!" Here we are: His children. We've been given this gorgeous earth that gives us all of the things our bodies need. I have shelter, an amazing husband, the gospel, healthy children, wonderful parents and siblings, good friends and neighbors..... and I find reasons to fight. I find reasons to complain. I find ways to be unhappy. I can almost feel God looking down and thinking, "Oh man! What more do you need! You have everything! Just be happy! Use what you have and make the most of it!"

The things that are so important and so monumental to me are not, in the long scheme of things, super important. In Heavenly Father's eternally vast and omniscient perspective, my problems are trivial! My troubles are small and easily remedied. Just like I can look at E getting SO angry that Lils touched his lunch or Baby No wants the pink towel, not the orange one. Whatever their problems are, I try to get them to laugh about it, talk about it, think about it in perspective. Most times they can't. These are the things they have control over and they don't have the same perspective that I do. I mean, if I could go back to high school with the mind set that I have now, I would laugh at the mean girls with the snooty fashion! I wouldn't be intimidated by them. I wouldn't be so obsessed with listening to the cool music or wearing the name brands or having to have a boy like me to know that I was worth something. Please.

I am going off on a tangent, but what it comes down to is this: I have a greater perspective than my kids, Heavenly Father has the greatest of all. "For Behold, this is my work and my glory, to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man" (Moses 1:39) Our Heavenly Father just wants us to be happy, to be grateful! And sometimes we get sent to our rooms (figuratively) all morning so that we can realize how good we have it! This is why we're here and I am very much like my children. I can get very whiny and ungrateful when I am in my own little tunnel of short vision. Does it really matter? What are the most important things in life? Am I putting the right amount of push on the things that matter most? Where are my priorities?

I don't want to sound like my kids are always whining and fighting, I do find the joy in the little things. They really are pretty fun.... mostly. :) And I do take the comments from the older generation to heart when I hear "enjoy them while they're young! They grow up so fast!" I do and I remind myself to everyday. But that doesn't mean it isn't a little crazy too.

That is all. Those are my jumbled musings on a Tuesday night.